Wednesday, May 24, 2006
Conversation Topics
A prevailing thought in "the community" is that you don't want to talk about commonplace topics - the thought is that everyone else does that, so you've got to be different.
This "rule" is just about the biggest piece of shit that I can think of.
If you're on a college campus, and you see a girl is holding a bio book -- talk about bio! Ask her what she thinks of the class, how it fits into her life plans. Talk about how you were studying biology in your psych class the other day..
"Topics" are just vehicles for you to relate to each other and vibe. Topics arn't important.
If you're staying on a surface level - regardless of the topic - you won't have a succesful interaction.
If you can take a conversation deeper and discuss feeligns and emotions -regardless of the topic - you will be rewarded with an incredible interaction, as well as something to do later that night.
Go to any bar and watch the naturals work. They arn't telling girls about best friend tests, they are talking about school, work, vacation, art, music, news...
They are just doing so in a way that lets the girls recognize their commonalities and create connections.
A final word on this subject - don't be afraid to ask generic questions - at first. "So what do you do?" Is a great question. You can't stop there, you have to go deeper. You have to relate to her. But don't be afraid to ask informational questions, they're a neccesity.
This "rule" is just about the biggest piece of shit that I can think of.
If you're on a college campus, and you see a girl is holding a bio book -- talk about bio! Ask her what she thinks of the class, how it fits into her life plans. Talk about how you were studying biology in your psych class the other day..
"Topics" are just vehicles for you to relate to each other and vibe. Topics arn't important.
If you're staying on a surface level - regardless of the topic - you won't have a succesful interaction.
If you can take a conversation deeper and discuss feeligns and emotions -regardless of the topic - you will be rewarded with an incredible interaction, as well as something to do later that night.
Go to any bar and watch the naturals work. They arn't telling girls about best friend tests, they are talking about school, work, vacation, art, music, news...
They are just doing so in a way that lets the girls recognize their commonalities and create connections.
A final word on this subject - don't be afraid to ask generic questions - at first. "So what do you do?" Is a great question. You can't stop there, you have to go deeper. You have to relate to her. But don't be afraid to ask informational questions, they're a neccesity.
|| Knoweldge One (Formerly Spitkicker), 12:04 PM
4 Comments:
I really like Juggler’s work and what you post here. It’s really inspiring and universal. Every guy in the world should read this. But I’ve noticed you don’t seem to like Mystery Method and structured approach patterns. In an ideal world, I wouldn’t like them too and would think Charisma-learning is sufficient. True, Mystery Method dehumanizes a relation between a man and a woman. It’s sad that it exists and it’s even sadder that it works. But you see, not every guy would be able to assimilate and apply what you post here or what juggler writes. Some guys are so wussified that their feelings are actually bad for them. It’s very hard to make a turnaround of a downward spiral of emotions. For some guys, it’s simpler to just throw their emotions in the garbage can and use MM. I personally would follow the Attract-Comfort-Seduce plan until I see the bigger picture and have no more need of it.
the whole thing with mystery method is that it presumes you're not good enough as you are. It promotes adding layers to yourself to make you appear mysterious and challenging to women. Maybe that's worth it to some people.
Me, personally, I prefer juggler. Juggler promotes getting to know yourself more and more. Revealing yourself, your vulnerabilities and your core and putting them on display; your feelings about everything and knowing how to express them. I've used this to better a relationship with my parents. I mean, come on, the hell with women. If I can create a better relationship with my parents using this stuff, that's way more valuable than anything with women! You're not going to use A1, A2, A3, C1, etc on your parents!! I've used Juggler stuff at work, with friends. It's just natural.
But it also requires introspection and being comfortable with yourself and expressing your feelings more. So the 2 methods are in direct contrast with each other. One adds layers, another strips layers. How do you want to go?
Me, personally, I prefer juggler. Juggler promotes getting to know yourself more and more. Revealing yourself, your vulnerabilities and your core and putting them on display; your feelings about everything and knowing how to express them. I've used this to better a relationship with my parents. I mean, come on, the hell with women. If I can create a better relationship with my parents using this stuff, that's way more valuable than anything with women! You're not going to use A1, A2, A3, C1, etc on your parents!! I've used Juggler stuff at work, with friends. It's just natural.
But it also requires introspection and being comfortable with yourself and expressing your feelings more. So the 2 methods are in direct contrast with each other. One adds layers, another strips layers. How do you want to go?
Charlie Brown,
I feel you, definately. But you have to realize that I'm trying to help you "see the big picture".
The thing about this seduction community is that great guys who have great values and morals, are "seduced" into throwing them out in order to attract women. If you lack strong morals and values (playing games with people, insulting them, pretending not to be interested in people, not calling girls back, being manipulative, viewing women as objects) what type of man are you?
In the end, nothing can hide who you truly are. Nothing..
Trust me, I've played games to get some of the hottest fucking girls I could ever imagine..but it wasn't satisfying..because the connection wasn't real...and slowly as the real me was exposed, and didn't match up with what I presented them...things got screwed up.
Scripts and routines and all of that monkey dancing bs puts you in a desperately low value roll.
I feel you, definately. But you have to realize that I'm trying to help you "see the big picture".
The thing about this seduction community is that great guys who have great values and morals, are "seduced" into throwing them out in order to attract women. If you lack strong morals and values (playing games with people, insulting them, pretending not to be interested in people, not calling girls back, being manipulative, viewing women as objects) what type of man are you?
In the end, nothing can hide who you truly are. Nothing..
Trust me, I've played games to get some of the hottest fucking girls I could ever imagine..but it wasn't satisfying..because the connection wasn't real...and slowly as the real me was exposed, and didn't match up with what I presented them...things got screwed up.
Scripts and routines and all of that monkey dancing bs puts you in a desperately low value roll.
You know what Spitkicker? I think you convinced me that canned material and routines suck, even for newbies.
Here’s why :
A newbie learning MysteryMethod will find himself in a set that doesn’t react so well or lose interest after a couple of minutes and he’ll start to overthink the situation. “Uh-oh, I’m losing this set.” He’ll have an irresistible urge to eject and analyse why he wasn’t able to manipulate the relationship according to MM’s precise scheme. He’ll tell himself : “Oh right! I forgot to proceed to C1/I should’ve isolated at that point/I didn’t DHV enough/I should’ve used a neg there.” He will be satisfied by this explanation and blame his lack of experience with the template for his failure to close. The simple fact that he’s mainly concerned about closing will make his game really hard to keep, because he’s fighting with himself to try to appear genuine, while he’s not really. This can be mentally exhausting.
A guy who feels good about himself will not be concerned by the apparent situation of the set. He’s not trying to control the mind of a “target”. He doesn’t seek validation from his success with women. He doesn’t need approval. If he doesn’t feel that the person he’s talking to is responsive enough, he will give her a chance to open up and be interesting, not sweep her back with a gimmick. He knows that ejecting can be rude and gives away a lack of genuine interest in the relationship that was just initiated. He will feel sorry if he didn’t seem to click with the person and he might even say so before leaving. This is a much more positive outlook and it has much more chances of getting further.
Guilt is powerful. Not being genuine brings guilt. I can’t have fun with girls if I’m feeling guilty and I can’t keep talking with a girl if I’m not having fun.
Natural game is better. It can never die. It can never be exposed. It is guilt-free and true.
Here’s why :
A newbie learning MysteryMethod will find himself in a set that doesn’t react so well or lose interest after a couple of minutes and he’ll start to overthink the situation. “Uh-oh, I’m losing this set.” He’ll have an irresistible urge to eject and analyse why he wasn’t able to manipulate the relationship according to MM’s precise scheme. He’ll tell himself : “Oh right! I forgot to proceed to C1/I should’ve isolated at that point/I didn’t DHV enough/I should’ve used a neg there.” He will be satisfied by this explanation and blame his lack of experience with the template for his failure to close. The simple fact that he’s mainly concerned about closing will make his game really hard to keep, because he’s fighting with himself to try to appear genuine, while he’s not really. This can be mentally exhausting.
A guy who feels good about himself will not be concerned by the apparent situation of the set. He’s not trying to control the mind of a “target”. He doesn’t seek validation from his success with women. He doesn’t need approval. If he doesn’t feel that the person he’s talking to is responsive enough, he will give her a chance to open up and be interesting, not sweep her back with a gimmick. He knows that ejecting can be rude and gives away a lack of genuine interest in the relationship that was just initiated. He will feel sorry if he didn’t seem to click with the person and he might even say so before leaving. This is a much more positive outlook and it has much more chances of getting further.
Guilt is powerful. Not being genuine brings guilt. I can’t have fun with girls if I’m feeling guilty and I can’t keep talking with a girl if I’m not having fun.
Natural game is better. It can never die. It can never be exposed. It is guilt-free and true.
